You know you wanna.

HER MAJESTY

And They All Agree

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Crap la this is the second time i've felt so helpless about my hair why can't ANYBODY respect how I like my hair done. Urgh it's my hair not anybody else's. If i like my hair done in a certain way it's cuz i'm comfortable with it, how can you just modify one part of somebody like it's your own. And then that person's crushed, almost literally, and you can still not feel guilty, but actually feel good about it? The cruelty of this world never ceases to amaze me.

Omg all the people in this world i know who have authority just can't keep to themselves and their principles. Seriously everybody's driving me mad i feel like my head is gonna explode. Like everybody's driving me off a cliff omg wtf i can see names and face pushing me off. Just stop it.

I'm freaking ruined.

My head looks like some poor kid who got picked up from the drain and decided to use a butter knife to snip her hair off. It's disgusting. I can't live with myself i don't even know what to do. I can't even look at myself in the mirror now.

OH WORLD WHY DO YOU TAKE AWAY THESE THINGS AWAY FROM ME. I USED TO LOVE MY HAIR THE WAY IT WAS AND YOU'VE TAKEN THAT AWAY TOO. ONE OF THE ONLY THINGS I'VE FELT COMFORTABLE WITH.

Since my hair's been snipped off, it's like half of Rachelle's been snipped off too. So you know what, screw this rachelle is dead. I dunno who the hell this is but it's not rachelle. I miss my hair. She was like a close friend and like one of the few objects in my life that made me feel comfortable. Cutting them off was like knocking down the door in my room, or opening the doors of a moving train. You've killed them. And now you've killed me. And it's not just the hair. It's about a lot of things. I've said this a lot of times before, i never thought i'd have to say this again - never judge a girl by her hair. I hate this place. I wish i could be all alone. This computer's my only friend. Who needs to get out and see the world when everywhere you go is a shopping center of lies. At least this machine wouldn't lie to me. At least nothing here would lie to me.

Omg i need to get out of here. Shit la there's no way out you know i think i'll just die.

I always remember you old rachelle. And i'll never forget the harsh cruelty you delt with in this horrible world.

Monday, November 30, 2009

Holidays thus far are a phase of thorough enjoyment and will be to come: Absolutely.

Holidays are satisfying and have achieved productivity: Alright now this is debatable.

Oh please! It's not as if i'm gonna sit here and do nothing about it! And i mean productivity in the correct sense, not of whatever the sort you think me to be.

Chopchopchop, time's running out!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Ah time is really ticking it's like, once this year had started it's been a bullet train from day 1. Anyway whatever with the metaphors i'm making this sound like a speech to conclude the year. Nopedeedoo it's actually a speech to commence the next.

Honest to self, i am ttly freaking our for next year. I'm not even a bit excited, i'm shaking inside. Yup good bye old Rachelle let's live life liberally (omg unintended aliteration!).

Ahh i've to stop playing around and enjoying. It's begun. That thing that i was running from and avoiding has hit me. Ah i could've slowed it down and made it easier but i guess it's still not too late. Okay so i've always had this mindset that like, once you hit a certain age, it's all downhill from there. And i don't necessarily mean academic-wise or financially or whatever.

Okay point is, i had this sort of theory that once you've reached the age where you've become a hardcore worker, you'd be confined for life. Stuck in a box of stress and workloads. Like throughout your life of education all the way to your career, you're pretty much stuck with the same stressful hard painful routine.

Oh this is scary. Whatever, there's no choice now. Nobody really had a choice. There's only one thing i can do to stop from falling onto the train track.

Mug.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Ahahahaha okay i'm totally feeling better and uncrankyish now, i've been thinking about it over and over and talking to sooo many people for help, and i've decided not to appeal! It's all for the best anyway!

I'm like seriously surrounded by the nicest friends + family + people on earth!!

Aahahaha i feel like giving everybody a hug and saying thanks sooo much i love you dearie!

Like seriously, without anybody's help i'd probably be completely lost and still stuck in my room crying my eyes out and feeling pissy and irritable all over. Hehehehe this sounds so cheesey but okay who cares it's a nice warm fuzzy feeling anyway.

I feel like i'm really the luckiest person on earth okay hahaha.

HELLO 2010, I'M SOOO READY TO BRING YOU DOWN.

Shit la i'm damn pissed off. Our teachers are like seriously blind omg i'm gonna get hell next year. I can't take this anymore i mean one year is enough why do i have to put up with more attitude for the next two ):

So basically, everybody else is pretty much happy. I'm friggin pissed off, i mean like this is completely ridiculous. I don't wanna end up in CO again next year. Ugh bye everyone bye world bye life hello bullshit.

Shit you know what i don't even know what i want. Wth am i gonna do with my lifeeeeee omg i don't wanna live anymore i think i've seen enough already anyway it's about time i can go now. At least i've lived life, so ending it now would be less painful. If i went on, i wouldn't be living anymore. So what's the point right?

Screw this shit i'm going to sleep.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Hahahahahaha okaay people are suuuper mean to me okay! Poor victimised me, always getting laughed at. I'm like the poor kid in school who always gets a wedgie and people laugh. Okay i dont actually get a wedgie but steeel D:

Okay choir practices have been pretty much brillll. Obama's looking like a no no so SCREW THIS APEC THING I'M BETTER OF PLUCKING FEATHERS. But whatever we still have to perform for that fat durian anyway so hahaha just make the best out of it. When life gives you durians, take out the flesh. OMG DEJA VU TTM.

Now according to my deja vu dream, i have to start talking about jeans. Then i have to go on about how the hell did i start talking about jeans?

Whateverrrr olly's coming back tomorrow yayyeeeeee ttly hoping we'd get to see her friday hahaha wth im like her number one stalker fan or something. Ahem. Okay.

OH YEAH IF ANYBODY'S DOING NOTHING ON SUNDAY COME TO TOWN AND CATCH US AT ION WE'RE GONNA BE SINGING FOR LEGO BRICKS.

LA LA LA LEGOOOO.

Hehe see ya love ya i'd hug ya but don't wanna!

Friday, November 6, 2009

JE SUIS TRES HEREUX! WHOOOO.

Hmm i've got a long week ahead of meeee, then i'll have nothing to do! Ahahaha boohoo i'll be bored to TEARS.

Let's see there's sausagefest, then there's 2012, then there's the APEC performance thing and all the other practices, oh so hectic! Oh and there might be a performance at ION! Hahahaha then i've still got to organise a house tour. AHAHHAHA.

Let's see here's a list of things i wanna plan. Hopefully i can, it's awfully hard to organise stuff.

1. A fatass house tour.
2. Another 2am outing.
3. A PRE XMAS PARTY/ CAROLING HAHA.
4. I wanna raid Ikea! Ahahaha hopefully la if anybody's willing to go with me. Ahahaha i've got nothing better to do, srsly.
5. Oh yeah is anybody planning a choir sleepover?

But really, IKEA'S AWESOME. I mean the food is pretty delish, and omg ikea is sooo fun you've got the showrooms which they change once every dunno how long! Like omg Tom and Summer in (500) omg so faaaarrnnn!!

Hmm, i'm just trying to keep myself occupied during the hols i remember when i was bored sick like 2 years ago like seriously i was nauseating everyday and waking up with a throbbing headache cuz i was SO EFFIN BORED. Heehee.

Okay list of things i ttly wanna accomplish:

1. Read!
2. Get a headstart on studies! (I'll try to.)
3. Um, post something on youtube. I think i shall post a video of ants dying bcuz i'm stupid and i've got no life.
4. Mess with garageband.
5. Write a song.
6. Write a book.
7. OMG, I NEED TO LOSE WEIGHT HOW COULD I FORGET!
8. Eat.

Ahhh I CAN'T WAIT TO GO TO EUROPE! WHEEE.

I hope mummy doesn't cancel it though it's so dumb. I'm not even fighting with that bitch i just can't be bothered. She's the one with the problem, not me. I MEAN HELLO, EVERYTHING'S NOT MY FAULT. I'm not the one with the freaking untreated mental medical condition. I'm not in a cold war with her, i'm not even ignoring her. She's the one showing me black faces and giving me attitude. I'm not even provoking her. Wow, mental much? I just have nothing to say to her. If she talks to me i'm not gonna ignore her. But i know she won't, because the only time she'll talk to me is when she wants to make some mental 9 year old with a medical condition statement. So urgh bottomline is: we're not in a fucking cold war, i'm just minding my own business, she's got attitude problems.

So whatever this would be an absolutely dumb reason to cancel the trip, i didn't even do anything wrong. You might be thinking i'm saying all this cuz i'm trying to push the blame off me, but i'm not. I'm just keeping to my own space. I mean like, why would i want to talk to someone if all i'm gonna get is a verbal bashing right? I don't need that. How annoying. I can't believe i'm being dragged into all this bullshit wtfuck.

Urgh talking about this pisses me off soooo effin much. I can't believe nobody's gonna do anything to help her, I actually feel sorry for her yknow? When she grows up it's gonna be even worse for her. Poor girl, it's not her fault she's so socially challenged anyway. So why doesn't anyone wanna help her?

Whatever this is none of my business.
I CAN'T WAIT FOR CHRISTMAS Y'ALLL!!!